In general, I am very observant about many things around me. However, when it comes to certain things, I’m quite oblivious to reality. For example, when it comes to sexual orientation, I don’t really keep a scorecard. I have friends whom I have known for many years and I couldn’t even tell you if they were straight or gay. I basically judge people by how they treat me. Normally, the subject of sexual orientation never arises. Once a friend, whom I had known about three years, told me he was gay. I’m not sure why he told me he was gay, but he did. I didn’t know how to take it. Why was he telling me now? He never did tell me and I never asked why he made this special announcement to me. We went on being friends very much the same as before the announcement. Later, I saw him at a party with another young man sitting on his lap amorously. I guess it was at that moment that I really thought of him as gay. But we were still friends. Then one day, we were talking and he begins telling me about this girl he’s all gaga over. “Wait a minute!” I told him. “You’re gay!” He then confessed that he was never really sure if he was gay or not. Well, it’s a couple of years later now and he’s still with this girl. In fact, they’re living together.
Once, after my sister returned from Mexico, she told me about one of our cousins. He was in his early twenties, a hair dresser, and living in downtown Mexico City with an older man in his fifties. My cousin was gay. His father, my uncle, was worried about what people would think about his son. He was worried that people would think that his son was gay. My uncle was either in denial or completely oblivious to the fact that his son was gay. I, however, accepted the fact that I had a gay cousin. I mean, he’s still my cousin! The last time I went to Mexico, I met my cousin again, believing that he was gay. Then, he hands me his cell phone and says, “This is a picture of my daughter.” I really thought he was gay! But I thought that maybe he had adopted. When he hands me his phone again, he says, “This is a picture of my younger daughter.” A couple of days later, we go to his apartment and he introduces me to his wife and two daughters. Okay, I thought to myself, maybe I’m confused as to which cousin was gay. But I was pretty sure that I was right about it being him. When I finally talked to my sister again, she confirmed that I had the right cousin, but that he had gotten married.